The most obvious way for us to be able to communicate instantly is through speech. We don’t always have to think before we speak, and this can be both beneficial and detrimental. We’ve all regretted words we’ve said or the way we’ve said them. Usually, these regrets are due to an impulse caused by anger, sadness, stress, or other factors. In other cases, this regret can be caused by something we could not say, or not having defended ourselves with the right arguments during confrontations, and it is often because we do not take the trouble to think and reflect before speaking. It is, therefore, necessary to do some real work on oneself before realizing that there is a real difference between situations where one can allow oneself to be spontaneous and say the first thing that comes into one’s head and other situations where one must really weigh one’s words in view of the impact they may have afterward.
How do you do that?
👉 You have to start by observing yourself! Think back to the times you’ve said things you regret, and in what kind of moments… does it happen to you often when you’re angry or even when you’re not?
👉 Once you’ve identified the conditions, focus on the information you’re receiving before you consider responding because sometimes it can range from a simple misunderstanding. Focus on the different ways people express themselves.
👉 Adapt to the person in front of you. Express yourself in the way that is appropriate for the moment and for the person you are speaking to, conveying the information as you mean it and without misunderstandings.
👉 It’s all about determining if what you are about to say is: accurate; effective, necessary, wise, or enriching. If what you’re about to say doesn’t fit into this pattern, you can refrain.
👉 Practice how you say things and the tone you take, sometimes impressions can be given that can very quickly chill the person in front of you and break the communication.
👉 Practice!